Kerala society needs training to learn how to appreciate the world around them; else they are going to face a deep depression and dejection that will force them to lead a melancholic life. This is a strong opinion, you may feel. But let me explain why I am so critical in my words and tone.
The other day I was at a concert. It was an evening filled with melody, fusion and contemporary music. The concert was organized as part of a book exhibition and it drew a small crowd to the venue. The audience comprised mostly of middle aged people with a handful of youngsters and two or three kids. The concert was energetic and pleasant with all types of songs being sung by well trained singers who expressed their passion for music intensely throughout the program. After each song they waited for the loud claps of the audience- Alas! Their waiting was not answered well. In fact, of the 200 odd audiences, very few only were ready to clap (that included the cheerful, loud claps of the three kids) and the rest sitting stiffly with tight lips and face. However this did not de motivate the singers as it was a usual response by the general Kerala crowd, who find it very difficult to openly appreciate and cheer for others in public platforms. Their appreciation usually comes out through ‘the light smile that brims on their lips and eyes’. It is tough for an average Keralite to express his emotion successfully (except anger) in public.
This lack of explicit emotion exhibition has its roots in the socio- cultural milieu of the society. Like every other society, Kerala society has its own special characteristics. However, it also has to do with the lack of emotional training that the members of this society is exposed to. Various social surveys have pointed out the fact that the happiness quotient of the person has a direct link with his ability to appreciate his fellow being.
“The secret to happiness is to appreciate the things already present in life. Experts believe that appreciation for all the blessings helps bring even more happiness in life. By expressing appreciation for all good things in life, we help make life happier for ourselves as also people around us.” Suggested Vasantha Chari in one of her popular articles. Kate Mckay, the motivating speaker, who is famous for her ‘Art of Manliness’ suggests that ‘appreciation is the first and foremost element that constitutes the happiness quotient of human beings’ . Along with this have we need to read the news about the declining happiness quotient of the people of Kerala. In the survey, ‘Life is Good’ Happiness Study, conducted by Electronic major LG and IMRB International, Kochi stands at a lowly 13th position on a list of 16 cities, fourth from the bottom, where Chandigarh ranks first followed by Lucknow, New Delhi, Chennai, and Bengaluru. For solace’s sake, Mumbai, yes Mumbai, scales below Kochi, as the grumpiest metro. This statistics can be applied to the entire Kerala society. According to one of the leading newspapers, The Hindu it has been observed that Kerala society is becoming more and more grim and unhappy against the higher life quality, literacy and economic stability compared to the rest of the country. It is revealed that the happiness quotient slides drastically down on psychological parameters- and according to city-based senior psychiatrist Dr. C.J. John, the reason for unhappiness is “our culture of discontentment”. He further says, “We are inherently a society that does not appreciate or encourage easily. Instead we criticise quickly.” “Expressing happiness,” he says, “is a skill we lack but something that can be cultivated.” It is in solidarity with all these facts, statistics and observations, I dared to open my blog with a much critical note that “Kerala society needs training to learn how to appreciate the world around them; else they are going to face a deep depression and dejection and forced to lead a melancholic life”.
We have almost forgotten to laugh aloud in public, leaving all inhibitions and worries about what ‘others’ may think of us. In other words, we have long lost the child in us. A continuous exposure with the critiquing society has turned us cold and sober and we lost our courage, innocence and free spirit to express our emotions in broad day light on public platforms.
The three children, cheering for the singers, song after song, suggest that we are not born somber; we are slowly mold to be so. The child in us slowly dies due to the lack of respect, care and healthy nurturing that it deserves to bloom and flourish. When the child dies, we become stiff, taunt and cold and our ability to dance, sing, sway, laugh and play fade away from us.
It is up to us whether we want to kill the child within us or nourish and cherish it to grow up who will in turn support us to feel light, bright and above all happy and content.
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Ref. 1. http://www.wisdomtimes.com/blog/double-your-happiness-with-appreciation/
2. http://kate-mckay.com/check-it-out-the-three-prong-happiness-quotient/
3. http://www.thehindu.com/features/metroplus/society/kochiites-being-the-unhappy-queen/article7386689.ece
IABS INDIA 